I refer to the article published on 29th May 2009 on The Straits Times Urban Section. The article basically talks about how well the society is accepting the “New Age Couple”, as more women date younger men today.
As the society evolved to what it is today and with women no longer being confined to homes and having the opportunities to widen their social circle, the insights of these women grow as well, hence it no longer so much of an issue to date younger men, as compared to before.
Today, women get more choices as they choose their partners. The relational formation and development for each woman differs as each has different criteria to cater to individual’s needs and desires.
There could be many reasons behind, when a woman chooses to engage herself in a relationship with a man who is younger than her. Physical appearance of a more youthful guy may be the first sign of attraction, and the idea of beauty is generally different for everyone.
However, a relationship may also spark off due to similarities which easily connect two parties together. With attitudinal and social preference similarities between couples, communications among them become easy and hence allow them to forget the age issue and often result in a smooth sailing relationship. There are also certain kinds of women who enjoys activities which men her age will not be able to appreciate, such as visiting to manicures or doing extreme sports, thus they also find younger men who is more opened, appealing to them.
A well known saying quotes “opposite attracts”. With a age difference, perspectives and opinions differs among the two individuals as well. Dissimilarities and complementarities also become a tendency to form relationships and are common these days. People find it more exciting to discover something new from their partner from time to time rather than being bore to death by things which they themselves already know or share the same views with.
Then, many may fear the issue of an age gap as it may bring about communication barriers in a relationship. However, as such relationship becomes more common and accepted in society, these couples have more chances to interact between one another’s social circle (shared social contacts), and hence allowing the partners to understand one another better and bringing them closer to one another(proximity). With the eliminations of the intimidation, uncertainties and insecurities, the couple finds it easier to get along.
Lastly, women would consider younger men due to the fact that they find them more
conscientious and appreciative towards them. The men reciprocate their feelings and this serves as a form of validation towards a relationship. Many women value this point as they believe it is vital throughout the course of a relationship in order to keep a relationship burning.
However, due to age differences, conflicts may become inevitable due to different perspectives and opinions of these couples. True that it may be fresh and exciting during its initial stage, but whether one can accept the subsequent differences that surface will be another issue altogether.
As the society evolved to what it is today and with women no longer being confined to homes and having the opportunities to widen their social circle, the insights of these women grow as well, hence it no longer so much of an issue to date younger men, as compared to before.
Today, women get more choices as they choose their partners. The relational formation and development for each woman differs as each has different criteria to cater to individual’s needs and desires.
There could be many reasons behind, when a woman chooses to engage herself in a relationship with a man who is younger than her. Physical appearance of a more youthful guy may be the first sign of attraction, and the idea of beauty is generally different for everyone.
However, a relationship may also spark off due to similarities which easily connect two parties together. With attitudinal and social preference similarities between couples, communications among them become easy and hence allow them to forget the age issue and often result in a smooth sailing relationship. There are also certain kinds of women who enjoys activities which men her age will not be able to appreciate, such as visiting to manicures or doing extreme sports, thus they also find younger men who is more opened, appealing to them.
A well known saying quotes “opposite attracts”. With a age difference, perspectives and opinions differs among the two individuals as well. Dissimilarities and complementarities also become a tendency to form relationships and are common these days. People find it more exciting to discover something new from their partner from time to time rather than being bore to death by things which they themselves already know or share the same views with.
Then, many may fear the issue of an age gap as it may bring about communication barriers in a relationship. However, as such relationship becomes more common and accepted in society, these couples have more chances to interact between one another’s social circle (shared social contacts), and hence allowing the partners to understand one another better and bringing them closer to one another(proximity). With the eliminations of the intimidation, uncertainties and insecurities, the couple finds it easier to get along.
Lastly, women would consider younger men due to the fact that they find them more
conscientious and appreciative towards them. The men reciprocate their feelings and this serves as a form of validation towards a relationship. Many women value this point as they believe it is vital throughout the course of a relationship in order to keep a relationship burning.
However, due to age differences, conflicts may become inevitable due to different perspectives and opinions of these couples. True that it may be fresh and exciting during its initial stage, but whether one can accept the subsequent differences that surface will be another issue altogether.
I agree that physical appearance is probably one of the key attractions for most mature women, as it is not only about the looks but also how a younger man can make a mature woman feel younger about herself. With a younger man as her companion, a mature woman tends to exude more confidence and this can then become a point of attraction for her partner. Hence in a way, physical appearance is in itself already a dissimilarity but yet a complementary aspect, which can be intriguing to both men and women.
ReplyDeleteIn addition, attudinal and social preference similarities would certainly aid in a relationship, as it would be easier for a couple to engage in the same activities with a similar view. For example, a mature woman would like to try out scuba diving or bungee jumping and her younger partner would be more likely to accomodate her wishes as he is also interested in sports and open to different experiences. Therefore, like the author, I also believe that some women would prefer younger men who are more open and able to appreciate such activities.
I think although the age difference may be a barrier, it could also be helpful in a relationship. Moving beyong the age difference, maintaining a realationship is just like any other.
Someone else also wrote an post regarding this..I personally feel that there is nothing wrong with elder women with younger men. As long as it is ok with everyone and it doesnt offend any peoples cultural values.
ReplyDeleteJust a thought: Has the dating scene evolved with society, or has society evolved with the dating scene?
ReplyDeleteOlder women dating younger men may be an increasing sight these days, but I do not reckon it is a new phenomenon. It tickles me that the media, with the aim to entertain and to inform, should analyze this as a fad/craze/trend.
You have brilliantly explored the reasons for older women dating younger men, though in my opinion, these pointers do exist in relationships with an older man and a younger woman too.
Interesting insights you've given and I also agree with J. The media makes a big hoo-ha out of everything. I can't help but to feel the gender bias against women here. They're frowned upon when they date someone much older; they're also being frowned upon when they date someone much younger. I think it's pretty much a private affair and they're only exercising in their freedom to choose.
ReplyDeleteI personally cannot foresee myself dating a guy who is younger than me, and neither a guy who may be ten years or more older than me. While it may be too early to say things like these, i guess my stereotypical mind just tells me that with age gap to far apart, generation gap is inevitable, and when this happens, i tend to think that communcation becomes some what difficult. Whereas as a woman, i would prefer to have some one whom i can rely on, therefore, having a guy who is older than me would generally seem like a better idea.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing wrong to dating someone much older or younger than we are. When such event occurs, it does not mean that one has done something morally wrong.
ReplyDeleteLove is a very subjective thing. The opinions of others may often affect the decision of one, however, i feel that when it comes to relationship, it should be an affair that concerns only the 2 parties involved, and not let anyone steer them away from their original point of decision.
Like what Hazel said, I too cannot foresee myself dating someone younger than me, or someone ten years older than me. The thought of doing either is just...weird. That would be like dating a younger sibling or your father,(IMO). However seeing celebrity couples like Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore (I hope I spelt their names correctly) still going strong after all these years despite the wide difference in age, made me think that such relationships aren't all "wrong" and impossible after all.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree that the difference in age could cause conflicts between the two due to different ways of thinking and perception, but love conquers all so I believe if it is strong enough, it will work out eventually.